The house is clean, Brynlee is sleeping....so this is how I spend my time

I should probably be working on pictures, but they aren't due until Saturday...so I'd rather procrastinate ;)

As soon as we found out we were having a boy I new what colors I wanted in his nursery.  Navy, gray, and orange.  I saw this amazing room on Pinterest (of course) and couldn't get it out of my mind.

While I'm not completely sold on the bedding, it will most likely have to do and it's the one that I have liked the best and is the most affordable.  Thankfully we are actually using Brynlee's crib, dresser, rocker, and changing table, so the only big things we need buy are another dresser for Brynlee and her toddler bed.

I started getting Brynlees nursery ready as soon as we found out we were having a girl.  This time though we have to wait until May to actually buy anything and set it up.  I'm going to be selling about half of my studio off and putting the other half into storage.  Then Brynlee moves into the bigger room (where my studio is now) and baby Boston will sleep in our room for at least a few months but we'll have his nursery all set up in what is now Brynlee's room.

So for now I will just keep dreaming up different layouts for Boston's and Brynlee's new rooms.  Granted I can usually find cheaper versions (on etsy, TJMaxx, hobbylobby, ross, etc) or make things myself that are just as cute, but this gives me an idea of what I'm looking to design.

Navy, Coral, and Gold Toddler Room/ Nursery by brittanystanly featuring rod pocket curtains

Tiffany Blue, Gold, and Blush Pink Girls Room by brittanystanly featuring silk accent pillows

Boston's Nursery by brittanystanly

Happenings

It's been pretty low key around here.  Our big news is that we found out that we are having a BOY! I still can't really believe it.  I thought it was a boy, but when the ultrasound technician said 100% boy I was a little shocked.  I don't really know anything about boys haha We are so excited for this new adventure with becoming a family of 4.  We are pretty set on his name, Boston John Stanly but who knows if we'll change our minds right at the end of the pregnancy like with did with Brynlee (who was originally going to be named Sadie).  

I absolutely stink at taking pictures of Brynlee during the day.  Our apartment has horrible lighting (with the exception of our little nook in the kitchen).  I want to get an external flash, but thats kind of on the last of the things we need before baby comes.  I am going to make a better effort though to get some pictures of Brynlee other than on my phone.  

We have also been redecorating.  I have been wanting to do this for over a year (since we moved here), but there was always something more important to put money into.  I honestly haven't bought anything for our home until recently, so we really needed an update badly.  I am just working on our living room and its basically done.  We are just waiting for the sofa that we bought a couple of weeks ago to get here.  We have never had new furniture ever.  We have always bought ours second hand and it was really starting to look funky ;) It was a splurge for us, but the furniture store was having a 60% off liquidation sale so we didn't want to pass it up.  In the living room are color scheme is gray, light blue, white, and accents of yellow.  I absolutely love it right now.  It's calming and bright and just makes me happy to be in.  Once it's all finished I'll put up some pictures.  Gosh I can't wait till we have a home of our own and we can paint these walls!  Thankfully we have a nice two tone paint in our apartment and not stark white wals, but I would like a light neutral soft gray one day.  

Since Ben gave me basically complete free range on the living room, with the exception of the sofa.  He likes leather furniture while I prefer fabric (not microfiber though).  The living room does have some feminine touches. I have to admit it haha but I love it and it looks really nice and coordinated!  Any body else ever have designer disagreements with your spouse?  Ben loves darker richer colors and I'm moving more into neutrals with pops of color.  So we are basically opposite right now.  I caved and gave Ben free range of what color scheme to do our bedroom.  Granted the only thing we are actually going to be getting our some frames, curtains, and a new bedspread.  Let's cross our fingers that it isn't brown haha  

So other than just trying to get ready for baby, and waiting till my sessions our over in the next few months to get started on his room we are just playing around.  I want to do his nursery in Navy, light gray, and accents of burnt orange.  I've been searching high and low for bedding and I'm really coming up short.  There are way more options of girls!  If I new how to sew I would probably just make the crib sheets and skirt myself and just buy a bumper.  Bens only request was that we get a couple of small planes to hang in the corner of his room.  

This pregnancy has definitely been rough on my body and my mind.  It was never this physically difficult with Brynlee so deep down inside I have this worry that something just isn't right. And I'm scared to think that I have another 20 weeks of this pain.

As I write this its almost 12 am in the morning and I've just woke up in horrible pain. I dislocated my ribs once again while i was sleeping, this is now the third time. If you've never dislocated them you may think I'm a big baby, but if you have then you understand the pain I am in. I wake up feeling like somebody is crushing my spin, it feels like there is 100 lbs crushing me making it difficult to breath, I'm so dizzy because of it and I can't even take a deep breath. Sometimes the pain hurts so bad that i throw up. Not just a little either, I'm talking projectile vomiting everything I had for dinner. It reminds me.exactly when I started labor with Brynlee, I woke up said I didn't feel.good and then made a mad dash to the bathroom. My throwing up kick started my contractions. So every time I throw up like.that I am so scared that I'm going to go into labor too early. I can't sleep when this happens and I'm one of those people that need sleep. This pain doesnt stop either, And there is nothing to relieve the pain until i get adjusted the next day.

I'm so tired. I never sleep well and I'm just exhausted and short tempered.  I have no support around here except Ben, who works 9 hours a day. I am on egg shells all day about when the pain is going to start. I am going to start going to the chiropractor at least every other week to get adjusted but the dislocating will not stop for the rest of the pregnancy. To be totally blunt and honest I'm so scared of the next 4 months and how it's only going to get worse as time progresses, this makes it really hard to enjoy the process of the wonderful miracle and gift of life that I am blessed enough to participate in.

I feel so bad for complaining about my pain when others struggle to get pregnant and to keep those pregnancies viable. We have experienced some of those same struggles ourselves and i can recall my feelings. At the same time though I wish I could talk about it with someone who understands what it's like to have chronic pain.  It's affecting my attitude and my Outlook right now and not in a positive way. Ben ran out to get me a heating pad and I'll be getting a blessing from him when he gets home.

Right now I just needed to write down what I'm feeling to get it out of my system. I need to remind myself that this will pass and in just a matter of months I will have a sweet little baby in my arms as a reward. Heavenly Father doesn't give us what we can't handle, so I am strong enough to get through this and there is a purpose for this pain.

2 Years Old!

I can't believe that I have a two year old!

Brynlee is the absolute best thing that has happened to our family.  She brought us together in a way that I didn't know was possible and is just a little ray of sunshine.

Here are just a few things that I love about you Brynlee bear at two years old...

• You're talkative- it's the cutest thing, you have so much to say and sometimes you don't know the right words but something comes out anyway.  You tell us (usually) exactly what you want.  haha you've also become a little bit bossy, I wonder where you got that from? ;) 
• You're energetic and playful- oh my is this an understatement!  You have so much energy for such a little body!  You get excited about everything, and you let that excitement be known.  You're pretty loud haha But I love your happy screams, I think they are endearing.  When Dad comes home you just light up and run around screaming "daddy home!! Daddy home!!" And immediately you make all of us run after you.  
• You're loving- You love your stuffed animals and babies.  You are so good at rocking them gently and you share your hats and blankets with them really well.  You are quick to say sorry and give me a hug when you have had to sit in time-out for a bad choice.  You love playing with other kids and are quick to give hugs and kisses.  You love to snuggle with me right before nap time.  It's one of the best parts of my day.  You just get your blanky, binkie, and come snuggle up to me no matter what I am doing.  I will stop anything at the drop of a hat when you do that.  You love your dad and I so much and we know it.  We aren't short on kisses, hugs, and high fives.  You set a good example for me to remember to tell you everyday how much I love you.  
• You're athletic- Man girl, you have a really good kick.  You love kicking your ball around the house and are pretty good about kicking it back and forth to us.  You also love your trampoline, possibly a little too much!  You are a very intense jumper haha and I can tell how you are trying to do your best, and jump as high as you can.  You also love to swing off the handle of the trampoline and hang from anything.  You've got a good throwing arm too.  This can be a good and bad thing though :) Sometimes when you're really happy you just like to throw something, other times when you're mad you will throw something.  We call this "hulking out"!  You are also so fast.  I'm amazed when I watch your little legs run up and down the hall way or outside.  Or how fast you spin when you are dancing.  You love dancing!  We have dance parties throughout the day and I hope we always do this.  You remind me to have fun and not care who's watching.  
• You're persistent (and a little stubborn)- I actually love this about you, you don't give up on something easily.  You always try harder and harder.  This is going to get you far in life in whatever you decide to do.  You know what you like and that's that. 
• You're funny- When you do something that makes us laugh you definitely know it, and will do it over and over again with the big grin on your face.  Just the other day we were eating dinner and we took your dress off to not get dirty and you just turned around and started dancing in the window.  It was hilarious.  You will make funny faces and do shake your shoulders too.  You keep me laughing throughout the day.  

So those are just a few things that I love about you :) Here's what you like these days. 

Favorite Foods- Turkey, cheese, cucumbers, apples, and broccoli 

Favorite Books- The Little Engine that Could, Sofia the First, and the Monster Love book

Favorite Toys- Any trains!  Your little kitchen, and your little people princess castle 

Favorite Clothes- of my gosh you are obsessed with dresses right now.  Everything is "pretty dress" 

Favorite TV Show- Mickey Mouse Clubhouse

Favorite Movie- Tie between Cinderella and Beauty and the Beast 

We also got Brynlee's stats and no wonder her clothes don't fit her well!  She only 24 lbs (27th percentile) and 35 inches (75th percentile).  We've got a tall little chickadee.  Ben and I took bets the other day to see how much she weighed and we were both off.  I said 32 lbs and Ben said 34, haha I don't think we can handle a 34lb Brynlee carrying her up our apartment stairs, it's hard enough as it is!

The Silly Things We Do

So I have a few kind of weird quirky things.  I can't have any doors open in our home without getting anxiety (I'm for real).  Even when Brynlee is playing with her toy kitchen I find myself constantly shutting her little door because it drives nuts. I also can't stand when puzzles aren't finished!  Brynlee has these 3 little wooden puzzles that she loves, but she will decide to take each puzzle and dump out all of the pieces and then put half of them away and then leave the rest.  I think she actually likes scattering the pieces more than anything haha.  One of Brynlee's funny little things is instead of saying "Thank You" she simply says "To".  It started when she was like 10 months old and we thought it was just the cutest thing so we kind of just accepted it as Thank You.  But, now that she can actually say thank you, she still does it and it kind of drives me nuts.  Brynlee also does this funny little head but with me at the end of the night.  When we are reading books in bed she will cuddle up and then randomly start laughing, smiling, and then gently head but me!  It doesn't hurt and we are both laughing through the whole things.  It's really the funniest thing.

Another odd thing I do is I plan out clothing a little obsessively.  I hope this doesn't sound vain, but I love picking out cute outfits for Brynlee, it's one of my favorite things in the world haha.  At least when she's throwing a fit over something she looks cute (obviously afterwards when she's said sorry!).  It kind of relieves some stress. We love our comfy clothes too though!

So we have a limited budget for clothes and I try to save as much as I can.  I usually don't buy clothes in-store, rather online during really good sales (and ebay!).  We have a pretty good system down so I only end up buying Brynlee clothes like every few months inside of going out on a regular basis just to browse.  I plan out Brynlee's clothes using a little site called Polyvore.  When I'm browsing online I will clip a product to polyvore and create a set of items.  This just helps me to keep track of what Brynlee has in regards to pants, skirts/dresses, and tops.  It's a good way for me to organize and think about what we really need to buy her and it helps me to see how I get the most out of each piece of clothing by just swapping different parts out for a new outfits.  I love that I can plan outfits on it!  It's just a little fun thing for me to do :) So I subscribe to newsletters from my favorite stores to get updates on sales and I also get special coupons.  And slowly check off the items on my list depending on which store is having a sale.  I typically spend enough to get free shipping on my orders as well which saves us extra money.  Another thing is opening up the store credit card (but paying it off in full each month you use it) and using that I will get an even better discount.  Also you get like loyalty money from alot of stores when you use their credit card.  For every certain amount they will give you a credit that you can use for an order.

Here's my most recent little outfit planner for Brynlee as she's getting bigger and more and more clothes aren't fitting her.  Can you tell I like little jean jackets!

My Kid Has Style- Sprint 2014 by brittanystanly featuring a denim jacket

15 Weeks!

I had my second Dr's appointment last week- Ben took some time off that day so he could watch Brynlee during it.  Next time we go in February we are going to bring Brynlee with us and find out if we are having a boy or girl?! I still can't believe that by next month I will be half way done.  Holy cow, this has flown by.

This pregnancy has been pretty different then with Brynlee, but for the better!  I really had to change the way I was eating and I've lost 10 lbs :) And I'm constantly running after and playing with a very active two year old.  It's only going to get better as soon as we are out of winter and can spend the day outside. My blood pressure was a little high at the appointment, but absolutely nothing to worry about.  I also have a dislocated rib, which hurts very very bad.

Brynlee is doing great! I absolutely love playing with her all day, but don't get me wrong I love nap time to.  She is in the princess phase right now, but still loves her trains, puzzles, and her trampoline.  We also probably spend a good hour or two a day coloring and then reading books.  I'm always impressed with how much she likes to read.  She can just read on my lap for an hour and not move an inch except to get a new book.  She calls all of her books by what they are about to.  Thankfully tantrums have greatly subsided!  Obviously not entirely, but we have seen a lot of improvement.

I've also realized in the last couple of months that I needed to chill out a bit.  I don't like being that high-strung mom who worries about every single thing.  So I let Brynlee make a lot of decisions for herself and it seems to work out better for us.  I have a pretty independent and strong-willed little one, and I don't want her to lose what makes her special.  Giving her choices and using a positive attitude works most of the time.  Unless she's hungry or tired- then she's a Bear.  Which is where her name Brynlee Bear comes from!  Overall though I am so grateful for my happy little girl.  She really is the most special thing in my life and I just love that I can spend every day with her.  She is FULL of energy, joy, and sass.  She loves snuggling with me again, loves princess movies.  The baby stage is really cute, but right now is so much fun!  I have pulled back a TON in my photography biz so I can be with her more and she can have my full attention.  I still take a few sessions a month, but I limit them to basically only on Saturdays when Ben is home and it's during Brynlee's nap time.

Life is nice :) Me and Ben got called to teach the 5 year olds in Primary.  They are so stinking cute and smart.  I just love asking them questions and listening to their answers.  Their answer to everything is "and I followed Jesus" and "do the gospel".

So one of my favorite things in the whole wide world is doing Brynlee's hair.  Every day after bath time I pop in a movie or a show that both of us actually enjoy (usually something Disney) and I dry and comb through her hair.  She has pretty thick hair so it get tangles easily.  Ever since I started using these two products:  leave in conditioner and aragon oil it has given her such healthy, silky, and bouncy locks.  And it has tamed some pretty annoying fly-aways.  I use it myself!  I've been told by a couple people that I shouldn't put product in her hair at such a young age, but I think they are full of crap :) It's not like I'm curling and burning her hair.  I don't even blow dry it.  And the product is meant to replenish her hair.  We live in a very dry climate, so why shouldn't her hair get a little TLC.  I am however looking for some more gentle products because I've learned that it is a lot of chemicals to put in her hair.  I haven't found any that I like that aren't like $20 for 8oz. which seems like a lot to me. I could comb her hair for an hour if she let me :) We tried our first bun today and loved it!  I can't wait till her hair gets longer and thicker so I can have more fun with it.  She's a trooper too and has no problem sitting on mom's lap and letting me pull at her hair as long as there is something entertaining her.  However, if Ben's home Brynlee won't let me do her hair.  She'll let dad do her hair, but lets be honest...sorry dads you don't do it as good as us :) haha he still can't put pig tails in! So if Ben's home I ask him to hide out in our bedroom while I do it.  It's therapeutic for me and so relaxing! Plus I love the snuggles.

Brynlee has also become so affectionate.  She loves to give us hugs and kisses.  And whenever Ben gets home she freaks out in squeals, jumping, hugging, kissing, and screaming Daddy.  She loves to run down our hallway to jump into our arms laughing and screaming our name.  If me and Ben are sitting on the couch together she'll come up and pull our heads together to kiss each other and then to kiss her.  She's also getting to be pretty bossy! Since she knows alot more words know and is better at putting sentences together she has no problem telling us exactly what she does and doesn't want to do.  She loves her trampoline, little people princess castle, and babies.  That trampoline could not have been bought at a better time!  With the nasty weather and being stuck inside almost every day (we only have one car) it's so nice to have an outlet for her physical energy!  And girl can jump high to.

I think that at times it easy (at least for me) to think of the terrible two's, but it's gotten so much better than it was for a while so I wanted to be sure to write it down so I don't forget!  I feel like our day is filled much more with happiness, dancing, and giggles rather than time-outs and tears.

Our Big News

We are so excited to share that we are expecting baby #2!! Ah I can't really believe it still :) I'm just too happy.  We had been trying for a few months then decided to take a break and try to loose some weight.  Then we find out "taking a break" is apparently just what we need :) Because we got pregnant right away.

Due date is July 2nd, 2014.  I'm measuring small (thankfully) and everything looks very very good.  I've lost about 10lbs this first trimester because I have the worst morning sickness.  For real, it's debilitating.  I basically live off of granola bars and water.  My midwife down here at Rosemark in Idaho Falls is so nice and I'm really happy that we chose her!  I got the best impression of her at my first appointment because I had to bring Brynlee with me.  So even with my cute (but very naught that day) toddler running around and throwing tantrums she was so friendly, patient, and just a gem.  She wanted to here all about my pregnancy and labor and delivery with Brynlee (which I love to talk about!) So it was really fun and she totally on board with my approach on how I want to labor and deliver on my own terms again.  I seriously love labor, like really love it!  I'll be the first to admit I wasn't the best pregnant woman the first time around; I gained way too much weight, didn't exercise enough, and was just a grumpy person.  But labor and delivery- man I got that and seriously enjoyed it!

We have guesses that it will be a boy because it feels so different then with Brynlee.  It's still really early in the pregnancy (I'm just shy of 12 weeks), but this time around I don't want to eat anything.  And when I do actually want to eat it's really simple food (nothing spicy, greasy, ew I'm getting sick just thinking about it) and I can only eat a tiny little bit.  I'm also so bloated, I feel like I can't breath well most of the time (okay exaggerating a little), but it is very uncomfortable, and I am beyond tired.  I could sleep like 9 hours a night and still feel like I'm going to snooze off during the day.

Brynlee is so cute.  I love how much she loves on her baby dolls and when I ask her where the baby is she'll come over and touch my stomach and say baby and blow it a case.  I have no doubt that it will definitely be a transition, but I'm really lucky at how much she loves babies and is just fascinated by them.  The only draw back is now when I throw up Brynlee imitates me.  Yea, you read that right.  She runs after me and says "potty yuck" and then proceeds to copy the yucky sounds coming out of my mouth.

I'm retiring!! Maybe retiring isn't the right word, but I'm not taking any more photography sessions (other than the ones I have booked) until I feel much better.  It's too difficult to find the time to edit and honestly the sessions are really taking a toll on me.  Newborn sessions take usually 3 hours and it's so hot.  I usually have to run out of the room at least once to throw up and I am just way to tired by the end and feel terrible the rest of the day and the next day.  It's not fair to clients and it's not fair to me.  So I don't know when I will start back up again.  But to be totally honest, I wont ever be working again as much as I have this year.  I did over 100 sessions and I'm totally burnt out from it.  I didn't pace myself at all and it took me longer to get people their pictures.  While I learned so much in such a short period of time I've also learned about what is most import to me.  My family. Taking a session once a week isn't bad, but you tack on the amount of time you have to prepare for it (emails, phone calls, etc), set up, clean up, actually do it, and then edit and follow up.  One a week right now is too much for me.  Somw people are amazing multi taskers- I am not one of them.  The last couple weeks I have slowed down has showed me that I need to do this for a while.  I feel so much less stress, I'm happy, Brynlee's happy, even Ben is happier.  The extra income is nice, but I barely make anything after you look into how much I have actually invested into it.  In hind sight I jumped in head first and went too big too fast.  Lesson learned!

Also Brynlee is turning 2 this week! Wait, what?  That can't be right.  Yep, my girl will be two years old this Saturday.  I'm going to weep all day probably.  She is just the best little thing in the world and makes us so happy and keeps us on our toes.  I can't wait to see Brynlee with him/her, hold another newborn, and try that breastfeeding thing again ;)