Friday, July 11, 2014

Beckett's Birth Story

To say Beckett's delivery was different from Brynlee's would be an understatement. The most important thing is that he and I are safe and healthy now. He's a beautiful little boy with just a sweet demeanor about him already.

At 41 weeks we found out that he was Sunnyside up and that I had too much fluid inside me. Sunnyside up is when they are head down but their body is fliped in the wrong direction, so if they are laying on their back they should be looking at the floor, when they are sunnyside they are actually looking at the sky.  So the chances of him turning on his own and not needing assistance before i went into labor on my own weren't very good. Also when a baby is Sunnyside up the largest part of their head isn't up against your cervix but your back. So I wasn't dilating. After a great talk with my wonderful midwife we decided to have me induced the next day by her breaking my water. I was still determined to have a natural child birth again without any drugs or unnecessary intervention. While getting my water broken is an intervention it was needed for us to have the most successful delivery possible. This whole pregnancy I had it in my mind that everything would be the same as Brynlee's labor and delivery. No pregnancy or labor and delivery is ever exactly the same. It was at my 41 week check up that I finally came to terms with the fact that this was going to be significantly different and that it was OKAY.

We went into the hospital at 7:30am and got all registered and checked in. By 8:30 Susan (my midwife) came in to break my water.  They take like this small plastic hook and go inside you like a pelvic exam and just put a little tear in it.  It honestly didn't hurt all that much it was just uncomfortable.

Then it's just the waiting game. Me and Ben just talked alot, I soaked on and off in the tub, and we walked around the hospital. I started having more intense regular contractions at around I think 1pm and by 2pm I was for sure in transition. Ben was a rock star and was just my total rock. I can't thank him enough for the constant support. When Susan arrived I was already in the tub and her and Ben were doing a lot of counter pressure to help with the pain. They moved me on my hands and knees onto the bed because this was the position that I planned to give birth in. With Brynlee I was standing up with my forearms over the bed and knew how much working with gravity helped, especially when bearing down.

By then I was pushing and no matter how hard I pushed it didn't seem like he was moving on out. My body collapsed. It was terrifying and defeating and I felt like I couldn't do it anymore. I had never felt so much pain in my life I was crying and yelling back and forth between "I can't do it" and "I can do it".  This pain was different from Brynlee's birth.  My face was buried in the bed just sobbing at that point I knew something was wrong. They told me that I immediately had to get off my hands and knees and they flipped me to my side and that is when I felt it. He was stuck. Literally his head was hanging out of me but his shoulders were stuck. It was horrifying for everyone in the room I believe. The cord was wrapped around his neck so they had to quickly flip me back over onto my back and do what was needed. I let out one last push with every part of my being and Susan had to put her hand inside of me to move his shoulder and literally pull him out to get the cord undone around his neck.  Ben later told me that the look on everyone's face was like they were prepared but worried.  By then there were like 6 people in my room.

She was very fast but at the time it felt like eternity. She put him on me but immediately I knew something was wrong. He wasn't moving at all, he wasn't crying at all, he was the bluish purplish baby I had ever laid my eyes on. And not the normal color that babies are born with.  He laid on me like a limp lifeless fish for a couple of seconds. They told me me that his umbilical cord had also a complete knot in it. So he was deprived of oxygen and they took him to the other side of the room right away and he was surrounded by 3 nurses and a doctor and they were whispering. He had also swallowed a large amount of aminotic fluid as well.  He didn't make any noise still and they had to have him on an oxygen mask for a little while so I couldn't hold him or see him since they were working on him.  I tore again pretty badly with a 3 degree. I'm lucky I didn't have a larger tear. He is a truck!! He was 10 1/2 lbs. And 20 1/2 inches long. There was no indication ever that I was going to have such a large baby. No gestational diabetes, i only gained 13 lbs, and I was measuring right along. He was 9 days overdue though. After I was sewn up and he was stable and most of him was no longer a dark deep blue I was able to have him.

The whole thing is still surreal.  We could have lost him. We talked about traumatic births a little bit in the birthing class that we took when I was pregnant with Brynlee.  This was for sure a traumatic experience for us and i know it's going to take me a while to be okay and to both physically and emotionally heal from it.  For the first couple of days I kept reliving it, seeing him so blue and so limp on me.

He had a rough entrance into the world: Shoulder dischocia,  cord wrapped around his kneck, and his cord tied in a true knot. I'm so thankful that babies never have to remember their entrance.

Even though it was a very rough road to bring him into this world I am so grateful that he is perfect now and I have no doubt that Heavenly Father has a wonderdul plan for him and our family.  I'm so grateful for the amazing team that I had there. The nurses were amazing, my midwife wad amazing, and Ben truly was amazing. I'm so grateful that I listened to my midwife and got induced because he would probably have only been bigger and even more stuck.  I'm so grateful for my body and the strength that God has given women to deliver children.  I'm grateful that even when I wanted to give up I didn't. I'm grateful that i was able to deliver him free of any drugs and that i was able to (for the most part) be in control of my body as much as possible. Most importantly though I'm so grateful for Beckett and the special little spirit that he is.

There is just so much to be grateful for!
Beckett John Stanly
July 10, 2014
10 1/2 lbs. 
20 1/2 in.